Dear Judson, It’s been five months since you left us, and I still can’t get used to living without you. Life has its joys.  I love your mom.  I treasure your sister.  But my heart has made permanent room for three people in this world.  You’ve left a terrible hole that cannot be

Dear family and friends, Today marks another anniversary since Jud’s death. I might have thought after 5 months that a little of the pain would begin to abate, but it just seems to morph into different forms of deep, heavy grief. However, we experienced a reprieve on our trip to Kauai. We cannot express enough

I am becoming more and more aware that there are many major losses, besides just the death of my child, that need to be appropriately grieved through this process of losing Judson. Clearly the most significant and obvious area of grief is my personal loss of my little buddy with whom I spent the majority

There are times my grief has made me feel unhealthy. In many ways I resent what grief has created in me: lack of initiative, an inability to reach out, extreme neediness, decreased social ability, diminished capacity to endure more emotional pain, mental lapses, and so on.  I have particularly feared that it has made me

    Dear Judson, I miss you. Just a few months ago, I was holding you, teaching you, loving you, and raising you.  Sadly, you’re a ghost to me now.  Oh, how I wish I could touch you, wish I could speak to you and tell you how much you mean to me. My heart

Do we have a little mouse living in our home? Nope!  Just a sweet little girl who likes apples.  

Heaven is a common word in the English language, often used to describe things of supreme happiness.  We hear people say, “This ice cream is heaven,” or “The place we vacationed was heaven.”  The term is intended to capture great delight.  Or there is the well-worn phrase, “for heaven’s sake,” which is an expression used

I didn’t sleep well during our time in Kauai.  It was very difficult to get into a snoozing rythmn with all the sounds and sensations of the island stirring me awake.  I laid in bed thinking about various memories of Jud. For some reason, I kept picturing one particular photo of Judson and his “big