Judson's Legacy

Heartache and Hope

Plastic Pup

Plastic Pup

Jessie is at the age where kids develop attachments.  Common attachments seem to be blankets or stuffed animals. Our little lady has definitely developed an attachment…to man’s best friend… It just happens to be a plastic pup! Jessie ‘s beloved female doggy (she has informed us that her pet is a “geerl”) has been known

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Watching Cement Dry

Watching Cement Dry

We’ve all heard the old adage, “That’s about as fun as watching cement dry.”  Strangely, I am riveted by a slab of cement currently drying just beyond our front door. The bench that we donated in Judson’s memory was installed at our park this afternoon.  They did some preparatory work yesterday, but actually poured the

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Torn Between Two Worlds

Today, I popped an old CD into my car stereo only to discover that the first song was “I’ll Fly Away”* sung by Jars of Clay.  I hit repeat and played it over and over while driving to Fairhaven Memorial Park.  Upon my arrival, I parked the car as near to Judson’s gravesite as possible,

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Illusion of Control

Most of us live in an assumptive reality*-we assume that our hopes and plans for tomorrow and everyday thereafter will occur as anticipated. We make a lunch date with someone and have every reason to expect they will be there at the scheduled time and place.  We get in our car and expect to make

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Carrying Grief

Carrying Grief

A friend of mine emailed me the other day after she had an epiphany about grief.  Her thoughts touched me significantly… ”Instead of patiently watching and waiting for you to work through your grief, I realized I’m watching you not get over your grief, but learn to carry your grief.” -MT Her insight into this

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Finding Joy

Finding Joy

It was a gorgeous day today.  The weather was sunny with bright, blue, cloudless skies, and the temperature was perfect.  Seeing as Drake had the day off (he took an extra day of vacation after Memorial Day), we decided to go to Disneyland-this was the first time the three of us visited together since Judson’s

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Leave a Mark

As a parent of a child who has died, I am desperate for Jud not be forgotten…I think this is the greatest fear of every grieving parent. It is not a fear that I will forget him (impossible!), it is as if the relevance and significance of his life diminishes if the “world” forgets him.

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