My Dear Little Buggy B,

In just over a week you will be turning FIVE.  And I marvel at your life. 

I marvel over your every breath and at how you have grown.  I marvel over how you move, play, sing, speak, laugh, jump, run, cry, and even sleep.  I marvel at your life because you have been given life—a beautiful, wonderful life—a life that God is allowing to unfold before my eyes.

But I also marvel at your life because of who you are, because of who you are becoming.  I marvel at the actual girl that is unfolding each day before my eyes.

You are such a joy and delight, Jessie-Girl.  Your eyes glisten with innocence and wonder, your words are seasoned with kindness, your heart is full of compassion, your touch is gentle, your mind is quick and astute, and your soul is mature beyond your years.

I am so incredibly proud of you. 

When you were first born, I was scared to have a little girl.  I was scared that you would be everything I am not—girly, dramatic, interested in dolls, clothes, princesses, dancing, and all things pink; I feared you would draw me into a world I did not know.   And sure enough, you are sugar and spice and everything nice.  Though you regularly remind me that I am a little “plain,” you have sweetly lead me to embrace all that is frilly, fancy, and fine. 

And you have also led me to embrace joy.  When all I could see is sorrow, one glance into your eyes revealed the most profound joy.  You have unknowingly helped me to keep going.  Unlike most other children your age, you have had to watch your mommy and daddy grieve during the most formative years of your life, but you have been the greatest gift God has given us to endure and persevere.    

Therein lies my prayer for you in this next phase of life…that you would develop endurance and perseverance.  May lasting strength rise within you as you learn to discipline yourself and work hard when things don’t come easily or are not as you would expect.  I trust God will continue to take hold of your life in a profound and compelling way while surrounding you with caring friends and mentors who can help sharpen and inspire you…  

Just as you sharpen and inspire me.  You are sensitive, obedient, generous, skilled, unique, forgiving, creative, and thoughtful.  You have challenged me to grow in these ways as we have been almost inseparable these last five years.  You’ve been my little side-kick.

But turning five is a huge milestone that brings with it a new independence as you will be starting school for the first time.  I long to protect you, guard you, and shield you from the ills of this world, but I know this is the first big step in holding you with open arms, arms that are raised in surrender to our Heavenly Father.

I love you, Jessie-Girl.  I love you so much!  I love you more than the air I breathe.  Thank you for being such a blessing and gift to your dad and me!

With all my heart,
Mommy