Two years ago June 13th was a Wednesday. I woke up like every other morning, got both my kiddos ready for the day, fed them breakfast, and then packed some snacks for our outing. But this particular morning was not a usual outing; we were headed to the doctor’s office because of my increasing concern for my boy. I vividly recall putting together a bag of white cheddar popcorn from Trader Joe’s because I wanted Judson to have his favorite snack.
Little did I know that our trek to the doctor that morning would be the beginning or our world unraveling.
It is hard to believe it has been two years since that ill-fated day when the doctor tried to hand Judson some of his popcorn and my boy could not see it. Dr. K looked me straight in the eye and said with authority, “This could be very serious. I need to order an emergency MRI and I need you to go immediately to our pediatric ophthalmologist. He is 30 minutes away so you must go now. Please don’t make any stops on the way.”
Serious? Emergency? Now?
In my worst nightmare I could never have imagined the road I had just stepped on.
Yet, here I am, two years later, having endured 5 months of watching my boy suffer and 19 months without him.
God says, “My grace is enough; it’s all you need.”
—2 Corinthians 12:9 (The Message)
I would not be standing today if not for the grace of my Lord. He has upheld me in the darkest of valleys. He has been extravagant in his love. He has been close to me in my brokenheartedness.
And yet, I have still struggled. I confess that I have wanted more from him. There are moments I have said that his grace is not sufficient. He has amply provided all I have needed, but I have gotten greedy—my wicked heart has said that all I have been given is not enough. This must break his heart!
Lord, please forgive me. You are enough! Your grace is more than enough! I praise you for carrying me these last two years. May your grace carry me home, however long my journey may be.