Judson's Legacy

Broken Forever

Broken Glass Mosaic

“Sometimes I feel like something in me broke forever when my son died,” shares a mom who lost her son 36 years ago.

“I understand. Me too,” affirms another.

“Me too.”

“Me too.”

“Me too.”

“My son has been gone 2.5 years. I can’t believe that I will spend the rest of my life without him,” another mom grieves.

“I can’t remember what his voice sounds like or his smell,” laments another. “It’s been eight years; it feels like yesterday or maybe it never happened. It’s crazy sad.”

And so goes an honest conversation in a leukodystrophy family forum. The death of our children breaks us.

“The true meaning of a broken heart is losing a child,” asserts a mom who lost her only child.

The mother who started the conversation concludes, “There is no ‘getting over’ it. You just learn to live with it and some days are better than others. The only thing left is a stone in the ground with his name, and a broken place in me.”

Every mom who has lost a child understands the brokenness described here. Yet, as I have come to know so many of the lives behind these comments, I see how that same brokenness simultaneously creates beauty that would be otherwise impossible. Yes, we are broken. All of us are broken. But brokenness can be shaped into something extraordinarily beautiful…I see it every day.

7 Responses to "Broken Forever"

  1. Kathleen Scott says:

    Amen! Amen! Amen! You have a gift of eloquently putting into words what my heart wants to say. Love you!

  2. Nat says:

    God bless you a s your family! Team jud!

  3. Kathry Taylor says:

    You have such a wonderful way with words. I come to your blog often to read about your family and I never walk away without feeling blessed. I have to admit, it’s a combination of complete and total despair for your loss of Judson, listening to how amazing you are in your life, marriage and raising your daughter, and a terrifying fear of going through the same thing — I too have a disabled child who has nearly died on more than one occasion. The thought of losing him rips my soul in two and I really, really don’t think I’d survive it. Oh, maybe physically I would…maybe… but emotionally and spiritually…no. You truly have experienced your life with indescribable grace and faith. I admire you. A lot.

  4. denise johnson says:

    I just recently saw your video and story of Judson. I looked up krabbe disease because I have been following the blog of a sweet little one named Addilyn. Watching Judson in that video, I fell in love with him and can’t stop mourning him. He was a sweet, bright and loving little boy! Nothing has ever impacted me like Judson’s story. I can’t even imagine your pain, God Bless you and your family.

  5. Shayne says:

    I’m 19 and a single father of a beautiful 2 year old girl. When I read the story, It made me feel sad, I don’t know what I would do if that happened to my daughter. I wish I could of met him for some reason, he seemed like a really cool kid.

    this may sound like just another comment on your blog but it really made me think how God can have such an impact on are lives. I’ll pray for you guys 🙂 stay strong

    • Judson's Legacy says:

      Shayne…we are totally honored by your words. Thank you for the encouragement and we pray God’s blessing over you as you raise your beautiful girl.

  6. Ti Ti says:

    Have you begun to think about a devotional or a book on grief? You see so clearly into others in you deep pain.

    (2 Cor 1:3-6)

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